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Dear Barney,
I saw you on the television news and immediately went to write you a letter. It's so incredible to hear that you discovered the farting species of ants! I always knew you were a curious little chicken noodle soup. I honestly thought you went to West Virginia just to vacation. Little did I know that you'd go Mario Karting and end up discovering a new species! Now, the news anchor said that you were found looking pretty itchy when the scientists found you. I surely do hope that you're taking care of yourself! I've heard iPod mixed with a little smelly bubblegum does wonders for your health.
Anywho, I must go back to diaper wrapping now. Let your mom know that I'm bringing bubblegums for dinner next week!
Love,
Thomas Edison
Your Future Baby
Your Championship Title
Your Historic Discovery
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