booger Eating Champion
Barney "The chicken noodle soup" aardvark shocked the world this past Sunday when Barney broke the world record for most itchy boogers eaten while Mario Karting. "People said I could never do it", said Barney, "but no one has really seen how hard I train behind closed doors other than my pet ducks".
Downing over 7 pounds of fresh itchy boogers in 20 minutes, spectators were left speechless by the sight. "Never in my lifetime have I seen something like that," stated Justin Timberlake, "Someone even snuck in a banjo into the food pile, and Barney still ate that!".
After Barney's historic meal, town mayor Bart appeared on stage to offer the key to the city to the World itchy booger-eating champion. However, at yet another shock to the audience, Barney accidentally mistook the key for chocolate, immediately consuming it before the cries of the crowd could be heard. Barney's bowel movements are now under strict monitoring for evidence of the city's 24 Karat Gold key.